In our image

After two days of stories, you may believe me: my husband and I are different.

But that’s not my point. My point is this: we can love someone unlike ourselves. And we can receive love from someone unlike ourselves.

In the beginning, God said, "Let us make man in our image…”[1] Notice the us in the words. That’s Trinity understanding right there, the concept of the Persons of the Deity.

So we see plurality within unity in the trinity. God intended relationships to reflect both those values at the same time. When we expect a marriage to be harmonious – both agreeing always– we lose the image of God’s plan for marriage.

Marriage reflects God’s view of relationship. Even when we come to God, we don’t meld with him like the Borg idea. We retain our individuality, because that’s God’s image of relationship. We are changed by his presence, but we don’t disappear.

We learn how to love when we are different. We can love something unlike ourselves – and shout. Whether physical/spiritual, male/female, leader/follower, organized/scattered… we can love and be loved by others unlike ourselves. We need to learn and understand that. Love isn’t based on harmony but on the choice to love.

God saw all that he had made, and it was very good.

Gen 1:31

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[1] Gen. 1:26

Shopping for drills

“Do you know how different you two are?” That was the concern from a mutual friend as Matt and I progressed toward marriage. We did, but in the fog dreamy mist of engagement, we focused on what we had alike.

We both loved God, went to the same church, had the same ideas on budgets and family. I’m still pondering modern dating services which brag about how they bring similar people together for a potentially long-term romance. Help me with this. It’s important to share hobbies and values but is marriage based on being alike?

Many years ago, I had romantic ideas about going shopping with my new husband meandering hand in hand through the mall comparing colors and styles, chatting about fabrics and combinations. You know where this is going.

He didn’t meander through malls. Shopping was more like competition with him, clicking a stopwatch to see just how fast he could grab something off a shelf. He conquered shopping lists.

Unless we were shopping Home Depot. Then meandering hand in hand was OK. But how many styles of drills are there, anyway?

Then there’s the way we make decisions. He hasn’t met a detail that doesn’t deserve his attention. To me, a detail has value only if it fits the goal. Before we leave on vacation, he thinks through every scenario and packs accordingly. Me, I think the probability is slim that the motorhome’s alternator will fail.

Guess who looks good when the alternator goes out?

He’s bailed me out of many messes because of his preparedness. I’ve re-focused his planning when he’s mired in details.

We’re not alike.

But my life is full, richer, safer, better because of his differences. Not in spite of, but because of.

Tomorrow, I’ll tell you why.

Tomorrow: In Our Image

Sunburns and bicycles

Call me crazy, but looking at my sunburned hand made me think about my marriage. Well, it wasn’t really sun-burned, it was a pilot burn, and, well, maybe I’m not quite as independent as I think.

Let me explain.

We’re fixing up a rental house in a town about 90 miles from home. My husband is Mr. Construction, very practical, and if it’s related to buildings, he knows it. Did I mention that he's is in Mexico on a mission trip?

Did I mention the furnace in this rental house? It keeps going out so we show up to a cold house.

“Do you want me to tell you how to light the pilot?” he asked on our phone call a few nights ago.

Of course. I’m on this rental-house-fixing-up team and want to get a lot done while he’s gone. I take mental notes as he describes the process.

Did I mention that I’m a visual learner? I’m trying to visualize the process, because it isn’t a normal pilot-light process. I know that process. Well, I did know before we got married. I haven’t lit a furnace since. But I could, I’m sure.

After entering the cold house, I went confidently down to the basement. He’d be proud: I’d even remembered the matches. I found the auto/manual button just as he’d said.

Hold on a second. There isn’t some pilot-light police that you’ll be reporting this to, is there? Do not read on if you’re of that bend. Pretend I called the $75/hour guys at the hardware store. (Did I mention that I’m cheap, too?)

OK, I turned the manual button and I heard the gas hiss just like he said. Great! All according to plan. I struck the match, lit some newspaper so I didn’t have to get too close, and pushed the flame into the furnace.

BOOM! There was a flash of flame and then quiet.

Yes! That pesky pilot light was dancing away. You see? I’m pretty capable.

While I’m thinking how well I can help out in this whole maintenance area, my kids come rushing down. They’d heard the noise and expected to find me pasted to the back wall, smoke oozing from my ears.

Assured I was fine, and very capable of lighting a silly little pilot light, they started giggling. Seems I had this frizzled curly hair on the side of my head. And then I noticed that my left hand had these slightly red spots, like a light sunburn.

A pilot light burn.

I’ll tell him tonight. He’ll be concerned and relieved I’m still alive.

That’s the value of marriage. I might think I’m this independent, capable partner but where would I be without him? He doesn’t write stories but he can light a furnace.

I’ve heard feminists declare that a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. I’m pretty independent and adventurous, but I can tell them that their fish never knows when it might need a bicycle.

Tomorrow: shopping for drills

Another religion

"When Christianity becomes just another religion, it focuses on requirements. Just to keep people in line, we build our own Christian civilization and then demand that everyone who believes in Jesus become a good citizen. It's hard to image that Jesus would endure the agony of the Cross just to keep us in line."

-Erwin Raphael McManus

Pouring out

When Mary poured the perfume over Jesus feet, [1] her childhood dreams may have soaked the ground as well.

She anointed Jesus with pure nard, worth an annual wage. What does your family earn in a year? Would you pour it out in worship of Jesus?

The first image is a foreshadowing of Jesus’ coming death. We know women went to his tomb with spices to anoint Jesus’ body, but Mary got the first chance to prepare him for his death.

But there’s more to this story.

The value of this perfume was astounding. Was it a savings account of sorts? Or, more likely, a dowry? A woman would keep such an expensive item in preparation for her marriage. In Jewish culture, marriage and child-bearing defined women. With such expensive perfume in her possession, Mary was poised for an appropriate marriage.

But she poured it out on Jesus’ feet.

Every little Jewish girl dreamed of her marriage, her husband, her children. In a breath-taking act of sacrifice, Mary chose to worship Jesus instead. In one sense, she declared Jesus as her bridegroom and forfeited her childhood hopes for a walk with the Carpenter.

A few verses later, Jesus declared the necessity of the seed dying as it went into the ground (like a body into a tomb) only to spring forth with new life and fruitfulness.[2]

Mary got that. Mary’s dreams died that day but Mary walked on in the new life and fruitfulness of Jesus.

The rich scent of her perfume filled the house and continues to fill our hearts today as an astonishing picture of what commitment to Jesus looks like. It’s about letting go.

In the same way, anyone who holds on to life just as it is destroys that life. But if you let it go, reckless in your love, you'll have it forever, real and eternal.

John 12:25 (MSG)

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[1] John 12:3

[2] John 12:24

Selecting Carefully

Most people are afraid terrified of death. We can’t picture ourselves with grave clothes lying a tomb. A friend once told me that when we died, there was a brick wall of nothingness waiting.

He didn’t see that he was already in that tomb.

We talked this week about Martha, who said she believed in Jesus’ resurrection power, but struggled to open Lazarus’ tomb. What did she believe? After all, what’s more certain than even taxes? Death.

What do I believe?

Death is something in the future, right? It isn’t now for me.

Jesus raised Lazarus to illustrate his authority over death. Death is not the end of the line and Jesus could connect his words with his actions. He came to restore life and freedom.

The mourners had limited belief. His own followers thought Jesus couldn’t heal over a distance and were confident that death was task-master over even the Messiah. They didn’t guess Jesus was the key to life itself.

Lazarus’ story foreshadowed Jesus’ own death. Both were buried in tombs, closed in by stones, wrapped in burial clothes. In each case, there was no hope of life.

But hopelessness is not the locked door that Jesus can not open.

He told the mourners to remove Lazarus’ grave clothes. “Let him loose!” he said.

We’re Lazarus, dead and buried without hope. But Jesus stands at the tomb, rich in power and authority. Death isn’t the final word. Belief is.

Jesus says to us: get out of those grave clothes and start walking. Believe it.

I came not to judge the world, but to save the world.

John 12:47

The Test

Talk about audacious. Today it would be like exhuming a body a month after the burial. We squirm with the unpleasantness and so did Martha.

Jesus had asked her to open the tomb. Her reply was understandable: "Lord, already there is a stench.”[1] She was in the acceptance stage of grief. She gently reminded Jesus, “he has been dead four days."[2]

Remember that after four days of death, there was no longer hope in Jewish circles.

To open the tomb would expose the indelicacies of death. Yet it was to Martha that Jesus had disclosed his resurrection power. “I am the resurrection and the life,” he’d said to her. “Do you believe this?”

She’s said yes and now he asked for the step. Open the tomb.

No longer were they talking platitudes or easy words of belief. Jesus asked for belief in action. Open the tomb.

Jesus said to her, "Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?" [3]

Decision time. Jesus came to Bethany, where he planned to reveal the glory of God, and Martha had to choose.

Jesus announced his intent, "Father, I thank you for having heard me. I knew that you always hear me, but I have said this for the sake of the crowd standing here, so that they may believe that you sent me."[4]

The purpose for all this was to develop belief. These witnesses were about to see a miracle greater than any they had seen before.

As Lazarus came from the tomb, impossibly alive, these witnesses saw that Jesus’ words and his actions connected. Jesus revealed the Father’s glory. Would the people believe?

Tomorrow: Selecting Carefully

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[1] John 11:39

[2] John 11:39

[3] John 11:40

[4] John 11:42

Jesus wept

Mary was followed by a crowd when she came to Jesus that day. Whether hired or simply sympathetic, mourners clung to family as they grieved together.

Jesus had delayed in coming and Mary said to Jesus exactly what her sister, Martha, had said: "Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died."[1]

Mary also believed Jesus could heal illness but apparently not from a distance. Where Mary thought she was revealing her absolute confidence in Jesus’ power to heal, she also revealed the limitations of her belief.

To understand Jesus’ own coming resurrection, the principle of Jesus’ power over death has to be made clear. And Jesus was about to make known his power.

But he wept at the limited belief of the crowd as he grieved the limited belief of his own disciples and also of Martha.

He told the disciples, “for your sake I am glad I was not there, so that you may believe.”[2]

He disclosed his resurrection power to Martha: “Do you believe this?"[3]

The Jews, seeing Jesus weep, assumed he cried out of love for Lazarus. But Jesus knew his next action. He wept out of love for the crowd, which did not believe. Their question shows that, for they also asked "Could not he who opened the eyes of the blind man have kept this man from dying?"[4]

Jesus wept for the limited belief of those who knew him. They knew only in part what Jesus was about to reveal more fully: that he was master not only of illness, but of distance and of death as well. His love encompassed them and his next words asked them to step forward.

Tomorrow: The test

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[1] John 11:32

[2] John 11:15

[3] John 11:26

[4] John 11:37

A sister's belief

The cold grip of mournful acceptance met Jesus as he made his way to the home of Martha and Mary. Although he had been summoned days earlier, Jesus arrived in Bethany four days after Lazarus’ death.

In those days, many Jews believed a person’s spirit hovered above the body for three days but there was no hope by the fourth day.

Into this atmosphere, Jesus met Martha, Lazarus’ sister. Undoubtedly Lazarus was the wage-earner in the family and his death left the two sisters in uncertainty about their futures.

Martha greeted Jesus with tenderness, expressing her confidence in his ability to heal. The idea that Jesus might raise her brother never occurred to her. That can be plainly seen by her response to Jesus’ words that Lazarus would rise again. She agreed: in the end. She believed in the resurrection of the dead.

But Jesus intended to stretch her belief just as he intended to stretch the disciples’ belief.

So he asked her to believe more. He could heal, but she obviously didn’t realize he wasn’t limited by distance. He could have healed Lazarus from far away.

But he waited til all hope was gone before arriving on the scene because he wanted to make a new statement.

Notice what he told Martha: "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?"[1]

Jesus continued to bring up the issue of belief: with the disciples and now with Martha. Into the place of no hope, Jesus asked for new belief.

Not a belief based on what they’d seen but belief based on what he promised.

That stretches all of us.

Tomorrow: Jesus wept.

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[1] John 11:25-26

About stumbling

It had to seem strange to get a story about light when the concern was with safety. Were they communicating?

The religious leaders hated Jesus yet Jesus proposed going back into enemy territory.

"But Rabbi," the disciples said, "a short while ago the Jews tried to stone you, and yet you are going back there?"[1]

His response? A story about light and darkness and stumbling. "Are there not twelve hours of daylight? A man who walks by day will not stumble, for he sees by this world's light. It is when he walks by night that he stumbles, for he has no light."[2]

This made no sense. They’d stubbed their toes in the night before, but why did Jesus care about that?

Jesus wasn’t done with his followers. "Lazarus is dead, and for your sake I am glad I was not there, so that you may believe.”[3]

Remember that these men had seen Jesus restore sight to a blind man. He changed five loaves and two fishes into food for 5,000. They had seen him make wine from water and give steps to a lame man.

But now they didn’t think he could protect them in enemy territory. Jesus made it clear to them he was going to Lazarus, already dead and buried, to give them belief.

They were walking in the light of Jesus’ words and signs, yet they were stumbling. It wasn’t time to stumble but to grow into richer belief.

We all believe something about Jesus but belief is not absolute. We can believe he’s a great teacher or a rebel or our Savior. And we can still doubt his word in other areas.

I have the daylight of Jesus’ teaching. Am I stumbling?

Tomorrow: a sister’s belief

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[1] John 11:8

[2] John 11:9-10

[3] John 11:14-15

God's selection

Kings will see, get to their feet—the princes, too—and then fall on their faces in homageBecause of God, who has faithfully kept his word,The Holy of Israel, who has chosen you."

Isaiah 49:7

Just in case?

This has to be a joke, right? On a day dedicated to love, you could also add in some religious cheesiness as well......I think it's another "just in case" product line.... as though God wants to know I honor him with my bubble bath choices, just in case that's important to him. It's not: he wants my heart instead.

Thank you!

Darla at Overcomer has honored me with this award. Darla, thank you so much! Your encouragement helps me search for new words to write and new insights to share. I will be passing it on so stay tuned.

In Uganda

In a sign of the times, a group on a Compassion International trip to Uganda are blogging their trip for us. Take a look:

And in the end....

Bob spoke to us from the grave. What would you have said if you have the chance? Bob created that opportunity, writing his own eulogy years before he passed on at age 90.

He had a chance to talk about his retirement, of the places he’d visited and the home he’d built. He had a chance to tout his business success. He had a chance to boast about his community respect.

Bob talked about his family and he talked about God. His family had gathered from Texas and California and North Carolina to honor his life and they heard a warm testimony to his love for all – down to the youngest great-grandchild. Bob knew and loved each one.

Bob closed his own eulogy with powerful words about his Savior. If one thing mattered, Bob said, it was your commitment to God. And he invited those present to make choices and to dedicate themselves to what he had dedicated himself: a daily walk to the Lord.

Bob’s descendants listened raptly, for many had done that long ago. They were Bob’s walking words, pursuing their Creator as Bob had done for 70 years. They had seen his heart and many had followed his lead.

If you could write your own eulogy, what would you write? What’s important to you? And is it seen in the people who follow?

Like Bob, you touch people every day. You’re writing your eulogy day by day. Is it about hobbies and entertainment? Is it about work and committees? Is it about awards and travel?

Is it what you want to say? How’s it going?

It's in the eyes

It was the eyes that made me notice all the connections. I was chatting with faraway cousins at our uncle’s funeral, realizing that, as I looked at each set of eyes, they reminded me of my sister’s eyes – and my eyes. We all shared our fathers’ brown eyes and dark eyebrows.

I never noticed that when we were kids playing at the parks.

Almost all of us were farm kids, remembering days of hauling grain and hoeing weeds. Our values were amazingly similar, too, and we all laughed: why don’t we get together more often?

Family connections are strong.

That made me think about Jesus who was sent by his Father. In his length discussions with the Pharisees, as written on the book of John, Jesus made it clear that he came from the Father to help others know the Father.

His purpose throughout was to bring people to the Father.

“No one comes to the Father except through me.” (John 14:6)

When Philip begged him, “Show us the Father and that will be enough,” Jesus responded clearly: “Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father.” (John 14:9)

Among all the cousins, my brother stands out because he doesn’t share the brown eyes. His are green but his actions are like all of us. He shares many our values, even down the calloused farm hands.

It struck me, standing among family, how strong these family connections are.

We all look like our fathers because we our fathers’ children.

Jesus was saying the same thing: people, look at me. My actions are the same as my Father’s actions. When you see me, you see the Father.

When we look at Jesus, we can understand that he has his Father’s eyes.

Want to know the Father? Look at his Son.

Dive In: prooftexting

Although I haven’t added a Dive In entry for awhile, I always reserve the right to throw one on the table when the urge hits. If you haven’t read the Dive In series, take a look here.

One of the handiest tools we have in our Bibles is the chapter-verse divisions laid out by Stephen Langton in the 13^th century. One of the biggest hurdles to understanding our Bibles is the chapter-verse divisions laid out by Stephen Langton in the 13^th century.

What frequently happens in modern-day Bible studies is a microscope approach to the text, where the point is “proved” by referencing a single verse or perhaps a short passage. But that approach, although simple and easy to approach, generally misses the nuances of the context.

And the system can lead to prooftexting, which happens when a verse is used as proof for a doctrinal belief. Pulling verses out of context can be misleading and may well ignore other passages that might modify or even change the conclusion.

Our churches love topical Bible studies today (and they can be very practical and easy to apply). The danger with topical studies is prooftexting, using stand-alone verses to make points.

Here are a couple of examples:

but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.

Isaiah 40:31

We often use this verse to comfort those who are suffering, weary in their difficult time. If you read chapter 40 and 41, you will see that the context is dealing with idolatry. The people of Israel were choosing to trust golden statues and wooden icons over God. So this verse, although a comforting verse, has more to do with choosing God rather choosing other methods of hope or comfort.

Context doesn’t reverse the meaning of Isaian 40:31 but does change the focus somewhat. It’s not about rushing to God in times of trouble, but choosing God over other gods in times of trouble.

Another example:

Peter said to her, "How could you agree to test

the Spirit of the Lord?" Acts 5:9

This is the story of Ananias and Sapphira, the couple who tried to polish their spiritual resume by donating money from a land sale to the church, even while they were lining their pockets with the portion they secretly withheld.

This verse seems to be about testing the Spirit of God, but the larger context adds nuances. The spark for Ananias and Sapphira came at the end of Acts 4, where Joseph (also known as Barnabas) sold some land and gave the money to the church. Many in the church at that time were sharing everything they had and many freely gave money to the church to be used to help the poor.

We could surmise, then, that Ananias and Sapphira concocted this grand scheme out of greed while hoping to impress other believers, perhaps nudged by competitive zeal. In that context, the verse we looked at refers more to the sin of seeking people’s favor over God’s heart. Other believers were donating money because ownership meant nothing to them. Ananaias and Sapphire were clinging to their own goods while trying to impress others with their spirituality.

In our examples, the larger context didn’t reverse the meaning but enriched and sharpened it.

There’s nothing wrong with singling out a verse to help make a point, but you’ll find that reading the larger context will almost always enrichen the conclusions – and may sometimes reshape them.

God’s Word is beautiful. Ignore the chapter-verse divisions and read it as the authors intended. You’ll uncover veins of gold throughout.

Life is sweet

In the beginning, God breathed life into a man and so we began our special journey on earth. I treasure life and that abundance that Jesus proclaims in John 10:10.

So what do you think of this artwork?

They are crafted by Camille Allen out of polymer clay, although apparently the buzz on the internet is that they are made out of marzipan.






Not going to say any more.... What's your input?

Judging Jenny

You may know Jenny’s story better than I do, but it’s familiar to all of us. Jenny was not only pretty but talented and drew lots of attention from admirers during junior high and high school. She never lacked for boyfriends, opportunities or invitations to parties.

You know where this is going. The parties became an obsession. First it was the drinking (“Everybody does it,” she reasoned. “Harmless.”) Then she sampled some pot. Eventually her family was devastated to hear she was hooked on meth, making bizarre upsetting decisions.

Their once-beautiful daughter was skeletal, eyes sunk deep in her face and a twitch wracking her hands. While they raged, she digging herself deeper into addictions and a bad batch of friends.

Once the "Jennys" were the backstreet junkies but now they are the cheerleader, the quarterback, the poet. Maybe they’re in the youth group or at our family reunion.

What to do? I’m not trained as a counselor and I don’t run a detox unit. But in crisis, I can stand up for troubled youth, supporting them in love and prayer and directing them to resources equipped to help them.

I remember well Paul’s words to the Romans, who were disgusted with the sensual lusting of others: “Those people are on a dark spiral downward. But if you think that leaves you on the high ground where you can point your finger at others, think again. Every time you criticize someone, you condemn yourself.” (Romans 2:1 The Message)

To a woman caught in the act of adultery, Jesus said, “Neither do I [condemn you]. Go now and leave your life of sin.” (John 8:11)

Rather than judging, we ought to be pointing the way to life and restoration.

You do probably know Jenny’s story well. Because her real name is Britney Spears.

Chameleon strategies

Those cartoon chameleons didn’t have anything on us today. Remember how they could blend in with the background, whether it was green, red or polka dotted? The plaid background gave them fits but they managed it somehow.

I wrestle with that question of blending in. I feel like Tevye in Fiddler on the Roof, trying to balance the issues: on one hand, it is good to be separate from the world. God commanded his new nation of Israel to be holy (separate for a purpose) and not blend in with the surrounding nations.

On the other hand, I see Jesus entering the world as a man, putting on skin to communicate and touch and save.

He did his work and then he left us here to figure out this chameleon thing. I’ve heard the arguments: be in the world but not of the world…our citizenship is in heaven….our battle is different from the world’s battle.

I’ve ministered with people who walked so close to the edge of this “on the other hand” thing that they fell over. Like that chameleon, they blended in so well that they became.

And I’ve ministered with people who so embraced separatism that they had no voice with their friends and neighbors. They became a clanging cymbal, unheard and irrelevant.

How do I speak the language of new and strange cultures without becoming?

There are no formulas here and I’m not a chameleon wrestling with the blue and yellow plaids. I follow Jesus.

Jesus was in the world, offering what no one else was offering: life. Some got it and some didn’t, but he never stopped offering life.

A chameleon focuses on the background but Jesus focused on the goal.

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Matt. 11:28

Praising

"These are the days when the Christian is expected to praise every creed except his own."

G. K. Chesterton

Staying warm

Fred had decided he was done with church. He had eaten enough potluck casseroles, served on enough committees, and chaperoned enough teen trips. He’d done his time.

That’s why he went on the weekend camping trip. Finally he’d enjoy the mountains with his family. No guilty feelings about missing church this weekend.

And so he found himself on Saturday night with a warm campfire and a young son perched beside him, toasting marshmallows. Crickets chirped the background music and stars twinkled through the evergreen trees above.

“Dad, how come we’re skipping church tomorrow?” Jeremy asked.

“I just need a break, son,” Fred rumpled his hair. “We’ll be OK. You don’t have to be in church to go to heaven.”

Jeremy hummed to himself as he licked bits of hot marshmallow from the roasting stick. Then he played with the fire, pushing burning pieces of wood chunks from side to side, stirring the fire. “Ha! Look, Dad,” he said, pointing at a charcoal piece that he had separated from the burning wood. At first, the chunk blazed brightly but then, separated from the flames, it cooled to a still black lump.

They sat silently for a while as the fire continued crackling. Then Fred took the stick and rolled the cold chunk of charcoal back to the blaze. It sat among the flames for a little while and then suddenly burst into flame.

“What do you think?” Jeremy said.

“I think we’d better pack up,” Fred said quietly. “We need to be in church tomorrow.”

Again, if two lie together, they keep warm; but how can one keep warm alone?

Eccl 4:11

A beautiful place

I've been fascinated with a new blog called A Beautiful Place. I stumbled onto (actually, I think I found it through Proverbs 31 Ministries). Shari Braendel has fashion tips that emphasize the modest and yet stylish. She describes what to wear from a Christian point of view. Let me know what you think of her ideas.

Women's psychology

This psychological study came from Camy Tang. Here's the report:

A study conducted by UCLA's Department of Psychiatry has revealed that the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle.

For example: If she is ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine features.

However, if she is menstruating or menopausal, she tends to be more attracted to a man with duct tape over his mouth and a spear lodged in his forehead while he is on fire. No further studies are expected.